Unwilling To

1 Samuel 15:9 But Saul and the army spared Agag and the best of the sheep and cattle, the fat calves and lambs—everything that was good. These they were unwilling to destroy completely, but everything that was despised and weak they totally destroyed. 

Sometimes we don’t know the reason people are unwilling to do certain things in life. Why does one brother pick on their sibling? They know they shouldn’t. They have been told repeatedly what the expectation is for their behavior. But they still go on picking?
Some people watch porn and just won’t stop. Some do the flirting thing using social media. Some take a little of what doesn’t belong to them over time. Some just can’t stop envying what other people have. You get the point. All of us have our points of weakness.
The king of Israel, Saul was his name, was a very reluctant leader at first. When it came time for him to be appointed, he was hiding. But after only a very short time, the power went to his head. His internal character got the best of him. What was on the inside came out.
The spiritual leader of that day, Samuel, told Saul to go to a certain place and wait for him to show up. Samuel would hear from the LORD in regards to the upcoming battle. All Saul had to do was wait. Sometimes that is the hardest thing for us to do, isn’t it!
But Samuel’s arrival was behind schedule, or at least that is what Saul thought. So Saul let his fear of the enemy get the better of him. He know the LORD had delivered His people in the past, but in the moment, his fear rose up and spoke louder than his faith.
So Saul took action, the wrong action. He was supposed to wait, but he did what Samuel was supposed to do. He wasn’t content in that moment of fear to allow Samuel to do his job, to obey the word of the LORD. He let his fear rule him.
So when Samuel does show up, judgement is announced.
They go to battle and the rebellion of Saul’s heart takes over. They were told to “totally destroy” the enemy. Instead, they kept the king Agag live and kept alive the best of the animals “for a sacrifice to the LORD.” Talk about dressing up rebellion in the clothes of obedience. Yikes!
They made the choice about what was good and what was evil, mirroring the original sin. So the root of their sin was deep. It wasn’t just painted on the surface like their “obedience”, it came from their core.
When we begin to doubt depth of our own sin and depravity, it is good to read passages like this one with its rebellion right out there on display. Because the rebellion is in us as well. We must fall on our faces before the One who bore our sin and depravity and cry out for mercy.
And He will save us from ourselves!