13 Then Paul answered, “Why are you weeping and breaking my heart? I am ready not only to be bound, but also to die in Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus.”
Paul seems to have a death wish, doesn’t he? He gets repeated warnings that he should not go to Jerusalem, but he insists on going there anyway. In the police world there is a term for this: suicide by proxy. This is when a criminal, usually armed, puts himself in a situation where the police have no choice but to shoot him. The man continues to threaten the police and bystanders to a point that the police must act and shoot the man. The criminal has a death wish, but they are unwilling to carry it out on themselves. They instead use the police to commit suicide. Their motivation is usually to get rid of their pain. They are usually depressed and often have other psychological issues at work. They are very different from the Islamic suicide bombers. The suicide bombers are motivated by a hatred toward non-Muslims that is fully sanctioned by the Koran and the official teachings of Islam. We can see it carried out daily around the world. The one thing that ties all the terrorist violence across the globe is Islam. It is not a coincidence. Paul’s motivation to go to Jerusalem is not a death wish. He knows that the Lord has a purpose in his going. He knows that if he does die in the process that His message will be proclaimed. He knows he will have a chance to speak to some very powerful and influential people, people who normally would not hear the message of the hope found in Jesus. These people have been insulated from the harshness of life by their wealth and positions. They have not reached the bottom. In fact they have worked to stay near the top. And Paul will have the opportunity to speak to them. It is out of this knowledge that Paul travels to Jerusalem. He is willing to travel so that he can speak. He will speak even if it means he will die.
The Arnold Journey 