22 Ham, the father of Canaan, saw his father’s nakedness and told his two brothers outside.
Everyone knows someone who has family secrets. In fact, I think everyone has some things they don’t want outsiders to know. This is in fact exactly the kind of thing that starts longstanding quarrels in families. After the Flood, Noah plants a vineyard and drinks some of the wine, too much in fact. He gets drunk and passes out in his tent. His son Ham sees this and tells his other brothers. They do what they think is the right thing, but in the end it gets Ham in trouble with their father. It would have been much better if Ham had just kept the matter to himself. Sometimes family secrets, those embarrassing moments that all families have, need to be kept secret. We don’t need to ‘air our dirty laundry’ where everyone can see. We are allowed to act privately and discretely to protect another’s dignity. We don’t need ‘big brother’ to televise our lives, the good, the bad and the ugly. It is preferable to keep family things within the family. Unfortunately, some family things need to be exposed. Incest is one of those things that needs to be exposed. When incest is happening, often other members of the family know of the behavior and choose to keep it hidden and do nothing. Incest needs to be exposed and stopped, even if destroying the family structure is the result. Other forms of abuse also need to be exposed. When a family member exploits the finances of an elder, that needs to be exposed and corrected. When children receive discipline that is too harsh for the circumstances, that too needs to be dealt with appropriately. There are times when involvement of the larger community in needed and necessary. But there are many times when the inside is brought outside without deliberate thought of the consequences. We need to be careful when exposing these types of activities. We must be sure we have the proper motives.
The Arnold Journey 